How Does Al Gore Buy Sextoys?

The thoughts that come to you while wandering the streets of Provincetown. Let’s say Al Gore decides that he wants to buy a little something special for Tipper. For him and Tipper really, add a little spice to things after the beard thing ended. A vibrator, a sling, maybe some bondage gear. How does he actually go about doing it?

He can’t just walk in, everyone knows who he is. He can’t use a credit card, everyone knows his name. Does he send an aide out to get the stuff? “Hey Eric, you’ve been here a few months now… you want to move up, right? Here’s a list of some things we need. Discretion is of the — don’t make a face Eric, just do it. Goddamnit, just do it, OK!?”

Or maybe the ol’, “Frank, I’m planning a joke party for Bill, I need you to get supplies. I was thinking of a blow up doll, or maybe one of those ramp wedge things… use your best judgement, just get a lot of it. Use cash, I’ll reimburse you. Um, I guess you should get a cake and stuff while you’re out, whatever…”

3 thoughts on “How Does Al Gore Buy Sextoys?”

  1. well, if you think about it, it isn’t in the interest of the sex toy shop to reveal this information.
    Al Gore makes a purchase.
    Sex Toy shop says ‘Hey! We’ve got a great gossip bit!’
    Sex Toy Shop workers do the morning show circuit.
    Sex Toy Shop workers realize, eventually, that this wasn’t quite the windfall they had hoped for. You can’t write a book about one guy buying one whatever. No matter how kinky.
    Sex Toy Shop workers find that business is dropping off quickly.
    Why?
    No one wants to find out that their own purchases might become public fodder.

    On a related note, I think I might have found the most skeezy website ever.
    http://www.ashleymadison.com
    Its a site to bring together people who want to cheat on their partners.
    That would be bad enough, and it isn’t the first place to do this.
    Whats really repulsive is the ad campaign.
    There’s the AshleyMadison.com voice, and then the voices of ‘customers’.
    The one that really stuck out in my mind?
    A woman saying “I’m doing this for me!”
    You wanna cheat?
    Then cheat.
    But don’t try to make it sound like violating the trust of someone you care about is some act of personal liberation.

  2. Mr. Boy…

    * The motives of the owners and the employees aren’t always the same.
    * It might increase business to have a celebrity go there.
    * It helps to legitimize the business.
    * C’mon. People talk. It wasn’t in Monica’s interest to talk, but she did. Word always gets out when famous people do something interesting.

    That Ashley Madison site is sick.

  3. Mr. Rox
    * granted. However, I suspect most employees want to keep their jobs
    * While it might, in fact, increase business for a certain subset of sex toy buyers (and yes, that might be significant), I suspect that most people would still shy away. Further, my experience with this industry has shown that they do put a high value on privacy.
    * Perhaps, but not really.

    One of the basic tennents (I’m obviously spelling that incorrectly…) is that what people do with their sex lives is no one’s business but their own.

    And yes, A-M is sick.
    It legitimizes being a bad human being.

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